My sister sent me this animated gif of videogames, and excuse the pun, but it’s just full of win!
How to win in classic videogames
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As bloggers, words are pretty much what we deal all the time. We like words, we like playing with them, and we like using them to express ourselves. They say that a picture is worth a thousand words. Well, here are some pictures made of, well, probably a thousand words (or less). There’s a full [...]
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My brother sent me this link from LaughingSquid.com with a whole bunch of movie posters by some guy named Peter Stults. It’s basically old movie posters, retooled for modern movies. Some of them are just pretty damn awesome, and it’s funny how much movie concepts and posters haven’t changed since way back then. Here are [...]
A few friends came over to watch some Hong Kong movies the other night. One of the movies we saw was John Woo’s masterpiece The Killer. If you haven’t seen The Killer, then you really ought to do just that, because this is just scene after scene of insane gunfights with pistols that never run out of ammo. Which is just great, because Chow Yun-Fat (the titular Killer) seems to empty entire clips of ammo into every individual bad guy – and he kills hundreds of them.
Don't let the guns fool you; they're actually best friends
Anyway, what attracted me to the movie wasn’t just the over-the-top violence and the “doves flying in the background while Chow Yun-Fat leaps into the air with a gun in each hand” imagery, but the story of a cop and a killer who find out that they actually have similar ideals and could be best friends. They hate that honor and duty is no longer valued in a world that is quickly becoming corrupt and greedy, but stick to their guns (no pun intended) despite being downtrodden.
Back when I first watched this movie, the term “bromance” hasn’t been coined yet. But when you watch ng.
Brothers in arms - wait, where did I hear that corny phrase recently?
Main characters Detective Lee and Jeffery the Killer exchange some of the corniest dialogue ever written, and there are occasional freeze frames of the pair smiling and laughing to really punch in the notion that these two would make great friends.
Check out the dialogue:
(Lee decides to help Jeffery blast bad guys)
Jeffery: I owe you one!
Lee: Consider this a gift of friendship!
Lee: I wish I could have a friend like you.
Jeffery: You will, in the next life.
Jeffery: Are you always this determined?
Lee: Yes, it’s my style.
Jeffery: Mine too.
Jeffery: You’re an unusual cop.
Lee: Well, you’re an unusual killer.
Jeffery: Would you rather see me dead, or set free?
Lee: Neither, if fate spares us.
Lee (describing Jeffery to a sketch artist): He looks determined… without being ruthless. There’s something heroic about him. He doesn’t look like a killer. He comes across so calm… acts like he has a dream… eyes full of passion.
"Consider this a gift of friendship!"
There’s also a female love interest too… but much like Kelly McGillis in Top Gun, John Woo went and picked a completely ditzy and not-very-attractive actress in the form of singer Sally Yeh. He’s pretty much saying “this girl is not good enough for you, you should be with that detective guy instead! He really understands you!”
The redundant love interest of the movie
While I’m bitching about Sally Yeh, she plays a character so conceited that when she has guests over at her place, she puts on the same song she was singing in a club in the previous scene!
But seriously, this is a great movie. Go watch it!
You know when you feel like you need to poop, but you just can’t even after sitting on the toilet for ages? You know how you walk away from that ordeal without any feeling of satisfaction, with your stomach still grumbling and gurgling – and feeling like you could’ve better spent that time reading a book or doing something else more fulfilling than planting your ass on a toilet for a long time without anything to show for it?
That’s what playing Assassin’s Creed: Revelations feels like. A complete waste of time.
It’s rehashed gameplay with nothing compelling about the plot. I just want to finish it because I’ve been led along by carrots in the previous two games, and now I just want to know what all that dumb alien shit is all about so that I can get some closure. Sometimes I wish I wasn’t so anal about completing a game or finding out what happens at the end of the story.
Ezio, I am disappoint.
Update: I just finished the game last night. It was, as expected, completely unfulfilling. The only “revelation” in the game was that there’ll be at least one other game I’ll have to play through in order to get any decent answers.
I did receive an epiphany though: I no longer give a damn about any of the characters or the plot of the series. Unless the next game is a proper update with new and revamped gameplay, this franchise is dead to me!
The Assassin’s Creed goes “Nothing is true.; everything is permitted.” Which is a pretty dumb self-important sounding creed if you think about it. Play the games though, and you’ll realize that the REAL Assassin’s Creed goes:
“Nothing is new; everything is recycled.”
Here’s another quick anim. Had to do a jumping shot, so I figured I’ll get a big heavy rig and make him do a “Hulk Smash!”
Oh yeah, it’s Friday 13th! Let’s hope I survive this one!
