As you guys might know, I’m in the midst of job-hunting right now. After talking to some friends who are in the dating scene, it does look like job-hunting and dating have more than just a couple of similarities. In trying to figure out what we can do to improve our situation, we figured out several skills that we should develop in order to maximize our opportunities in our respective searches. Oh, and swallowing your pride seems to be at the top of that list!
I kind of got this one from playing videogames. Gamers tend to use special abilities with limited uses very sparingly, but when it comes to weapons with unlimited ammo they’ll just liberally keep their fingers on the firing button.
When it comes to applying for jobs and trying to strike up a conversation with an attractive stranger, you are limited only by the time you have. You don’t have a small number of permission cards or anything, so just go on and apply to every job that you think could be cool, and talk to every person that you’re interested in. This includes jobs and people that you think might just be a little bit out of your league, because honestly, what’s the harm in trying?
Sure, you’re going to get a lot of rejections, but every rejection comes with valuable lessons on how to improve your game for the next attempt and whoever you hit on next is not going to know how many times you’ve been rejected before you get to them (unless you’re hitting on every girl from the same group of friends). Since there aren’t any severe repercussions beyond some slight damage to your pride, just go ahead and give all of them a shot.
I once got to the second round while applying to this studio, and the second round consisted of an animation test. I didn’t do all that well and was rejected, and sad to say I was like practically begging for a second attempt. How totally unprofessional is that?
I think the same goes for dating. A no is a no, and you’re really going to come across like a creep or a date-rapist if you don’t understand this simplest of simple two-letter word.
There are other fish in the sea, and no one job or person is the ultimate perfect one that your life cannot function without.
Fight for those little opportunities
That said, unless it’s a straight out NO, you should be a little bit persistent and keep fighting for those little opportunities.
A friend of mine had asked this girl out. She didn’t say no, yet she seemed to be extremely busy and could meet him for lunch on a work day. He took this has a sign of rejection, and almost wrote her off because of it.
Not every company or person is going to beg for you or hold your hand through the process. They’re going to have their own priorities and schedules, and you are definitely going to have to do your part to keep the opportunities alive. I’ve come across companies that either don’t reply or don’t call you when they say they will, and it feels like such a drag that it’s not hard to figure this as a dead-end.
But if you think that this opportunity is worth it, then you should definitely swallow your pride and take the initiative to keep the channels of communication open. A small shot is better than no shot.
Rethink your image if things aren’t working
I know this guy that loves to use the phrase “Oh, I’m happily single” before smugly spouting some nonsense about how smooth and comfortable his life is, because he thinks that projection of self-assured confidence will attract girls to him. Truth is, this guy isn’t happily single; Forever Alone is a better description of his life and that’s how it will stay if he continues to use such a douchey pick-up technique.
If you’re not getting any luck in your hunt, it might not just be that you haven’t met the right person/job and you really should re-examine your strategy. Think about your dress sense and the things you talk about, and ask some close friends for a second opinion.
Another friend was under the impression that he was always friend-zoned because girls figured he wasn’t a serious guy as he had such a healthy sense of humor. We had to burst his bubble by telling him that he wasn’t really as funny as he thought he was and those tacky Gangnam Style jokes and references KILLED any sex appeal he might have.
Likewise, rethink your resumes and LinkedIn profiles if those job opportunities aren’t coming in. I had a friend take a look at my LinkedIn profile recently, and he has quite a few suggestions and changes for me. I spruced it up accordingly, and before long I was starting to get more views and interviews because of it.
It doesn’t matter if the initial interview or date didn’t go as well as planned, and it’s just polite to follow up with a text message or email to say “thanks for the time” and so on. Maybe it really is a dead-end, but that doesn’t mean you should just turn your back and disappear into the night or anything. It’s quite rude when Batman does it to Gordon all the time, so courtesy the fuck up and drop that message.
Listen to rap
I like listening to Jewel and The Cure as much as anyone, but you’re not going to be able to charge into a job interview or a date and charm everyone with sadness, loss and perpetual longing.
You need that can-do attitude and driven spirit to really impress people, and inspiration for that can most commonly be found in rap lyrics. I know you’re not applying to be a drug-dealer nor are you out to pick up a new ho for your stable, but the basic concept is pretty much there.
Here are a couple of songs to get you going:
Note that I’m neither a career nor dating expert, so take all of this with a grain of salt.